Tag: seasonal depression

Monday was kind of rough. It’s been gray and dreary outside, and that affects me. I did my cardio with my mask on for 30 minutes, and then I joined Nik for some lifting. I was struggling to get my heart rate in the range I like (140-160). I didn’t go to fencing practice on Monday night because I needed to get ready to teach my Tuesday morning class. Nik and I played some timing and judgment games when he got home from practice.

On Tuesday I did another 30 minutes of elliptical with my mask on, and I was able to increase the elevation. I got my heart rate up into the 140s and even into the 150s. Extra fencing practice was a little more structured than usual. We talked about a simple but effective dagger technique. It can be a bit tedious, but I think it’s a good way for people who are new to fencing with sword and dagger to start off against other new fencers or even intermediate fencers.

Yesterday (you guessed it) I did my 30 minutes on the elliptical with my mask on. I was able to get my heart rate up pretty quickly (in fact, it went over 160, which I’ve been avoiding), and I was able to increase the elevation slightly for part of my run. I think my heart rate was so high because I was watching the news. Apparently I run faster when I’m upset. After that I went to regularly-scheduled practice. I got to fence a variety of fencers on a variety of levels. Since it was Valentine’s Day, I made a point to fence with my husband (we rarely actually fence each other since we’re usually maximizing our teaching by being in two different places at once).

Today… Man, I don’t know how I’m going to do today. I want to do 30 minutes of cardio, and I want to work on my fencing, and I need to practice Krav. I don’t know if I’ll have enough time to do all of it and still get a good night’s sleep.

Yesterday I hit the gym. Here’s the set list.

In addition to what I wrote down, I did 30 minutes on the elliptical-stair climber hellspawn. I have no idea what that was supposed to be. Shoulder & chest day maybe?

Fencing was fencing. I worked with some new people, didn’t spar much. I keep tiring really quickly. I think I need to work out less during the 30 days.

Today I worked on projects around the house. I was really drowsy despite drinking more coffee than I probably should have. I didn’t leave my house except to check the mail.

I did 50 lunges. Nik heard me in the studio and did some timing and judgment games with me. They’re fun and challenging.

I still feel really down and unmotivated today. I was doing better, but now I’m not. Let’s see if tomorrow holds something better for me… If I can make something better of it.

Today Nik took some of our students to an event. I had an online class meeting this morning and didn’t want to miss, so I didn’t go to War College.

I weighed in this morning. I’m still sitting at 202 lbs, but I feel stronger, and I think my clothes are fitting a little better, so I’m not letting the number on the scale get me down. We’ll see what my fat percentage looks like in a week or two.

Since I couldn’t fence at the event today, I’m doing 100 lunges to get my practice in for the day. I’m not aiming for a particular target. This is about body mechanics. I want to make sure I’m following the sword into the lunge, and once I’m there, I’m checking the placement of my knee in relation to my toe.

Tomorrow is a regularly scheduled practice day at the park. I’m a little apprehensive about going. I don’t want to see the people who saw me break down last week. I don’t want my mental condition to overshadow my other characteristics. I know I’m the only one who sees it. That’s the great thing about having an invisible illness. Logically, you know other people can’t see it. But when it weighs on you like this, it’s all you see in the mirror. We’ll see how I’m doing tomorrow. All I can do for now is take things one day at a time.

This morning we hit the gym and did Monday’s workout (since I was on the road yesterday). Here’s the set list.

Tomorrow will throw off our routine even more since the gym will be closed when we usually work out. I’m game to go another time since my schedule is open, but we’ll see what works for my workout friends.

In the meantime, we’re all buckling down for cold weather. Schools and colleges are closed, and military bases are locked down. Don’t hate. Floridians have no reason to understand how to deal with snow/ice. It looks like fencing is still on for tomorrow night (assuming everyone can get there safely).

In the meantime, I’m irritable and feeling low. I think I’ll do the human version of turning it off and on again by going to bed now.

Last Wednesday I went to Krav and helped students in my more active teaching role. I feel completely out of my element.

On Friday I got to go to UWF fencing practice, and I actually got to DO some fencing as well as teaching.

Saturday involved some beach yoga and a walk to the pier and back. I’d say I s wam, but I mostly just floated around.

On Sunday I resumed SCA fencing practice. Introducing a new student to rapier was a welcome break from the heat. One disadvantage to training indoors is you forget how to train outdoors. I emphasize lots of breaks and lots of hydration.

Yesterday, however, I decided i needed a break. I’ve been feeling kind of down lately, and I wasn’t up to any sort of challenge. I stayed home and worked on an art project instead. Yoga is cancelled tonight, which is kind of a bummer, but I’m looking forward to actually being in my house for some time before class. Tomorrow, though, I’m getting back into the groove!