The day after my return to the gym, I did cardio but didn’t have time for much else. Here are my set lists for the following days.

There was a hurricane last week, and the karate studio was closed for Labor Day, so my routine was off. I went to fencing Monday (since the college was open) and Wednesday.

The gym was closed Tuesday for the storm. Nik didn’t feel well on Thursday, so we declared a rest day.

I was exhausted on Friday, so I slept through the gym and fencing practice, but Nik went.

On Saturday I got back into the gym. I had a panic attack on the elliptical, so I left early. I finished my run but didn’t lift. This is the second one in just a couple weeks, so I’m going to the community clinic tomorrow to look into treatment. I can’t keep having panic attacks when I try to do what I love.

Today I got back for real after working on longsword. We ran through some drills and did free fencing. It was the most fun cardio I could have done.

CIC 2 Day 4

Today I was a little listless, a little unprepared. However, I made it through most of the day without using my inhaler (more on this in a bit, but I’ve been using it preemptively once or twice daily), and I felt pretty good about the techniques we trained.

The class that I taught went pretty well, but I was out of my comfort zone. I’ve been teaching techniques on how to deal with a situation in multiple steps (defending against a front choke or defending against someone covering your mouth with both hands). Today I focused my lesson on straight punches. There’s actually a lot to cover with a simple technique, and it was a challenge to break down something simple and cover the material in a dynamic way.

At the end of class, we did a drill called EVA. We were given two lists of numbers: 150, 120, 90, 60, 30; and 50, 40, 30, 20, 10. The first column was jumping jacks, and the second was situps. This exercise is timed. I got partway through the list and had an asthma and/or panic attack. I’ve never experienced this in my life. I was wheezing, but I was keeping up, but then it was harder and harder to breathe. I eventually bailed out to get my inhaler and jumped back in, but I didn’t get any better. My classmates were trying to cheer me on, but then I started to tear up, so I got worse. I did a half of the third set (45 jumping jacks and 15 situps – she told me to cut the sets first) before the instructor pulled me. One of my classmates had some canned oxygen, and that helped. I was super embarrassed. Everyone was super nice and supportive, but I still cried a little bit (during the exercise and when she pulled me but not after we left). Apparently, at CIC, Day 4 is when I cry.

That being said, if last year is any indication, I will come back tomorrow stronger, and even though the work will be hard, I will get through it.