Serfo was good. I had an amazing Saturday and a pretty good Sunday. I made it out of pools but not out of elims. I had really good fights and did good fencing. I coached others from my group who got further than I did. I didn’t practice any of the headspace stuff I’d been working on.

Castle Wars was the following weekend. By then I was a few days into taking Wellbutrin, and I could see a big difference. My champion won the Invitational Tournament, and I was on the winning side of some awesome melees.

Since then I’ve gone to Krav twice and fencing at least twice. Even with medication, I’m scared to ask people if they want to fence with me. I don’t know what my problem is. I’m pretty sure everyone would say yes.

Krav classes have been small, but I’m making a point to go until the Christmas holidays because once my work schedule changes in the spring, I won’t be able to come regularly.

Last but not least, I’ve come back to the gym. I’m focusing on cardio for now because I want to improve endurance, and I don’t want to change the way my clothes fit. I ran 2.5 miles on the elliptical in 33 minutes this week. It was a struggle, but that’s my starting point.

I’m apprehensive about the Christmas break because the gym will be closed, and it’ll be easy for me to stay inside in a nest of blankets by the fire. I talked to Tiny Nick about working on combative, though, and I’m excited about that.

This semester’s #30daysoffencing is going rough. I’m dealing with some depression stuff, and this week, just in time for my birthday, I’m sick.

I had to miss a Krav seminar. I’m sleeping all the time, and I got winded putting on pants. I’m trying to rest up for Serfo (and my birthday do-over) next weekend.

Regarding my mental health, I’ve seen a shrink, and she intends to prescribe Wellbutrin for the depression and an as-needed anxiety medicine that I can’t remember the name of. I had my blood work done Thursday, so I should be able to get my prescriptions soon. I’m looking forward to enjoying my hobbies again.

Looking back further, Gatalop was fun. I did good fencing and enjoyed the melees. I talked to a Master of Defense about some of the hurdles I’m overcoming and how to work on that.

Fencing has been challenging for me lately. I don’t know if it feels like a chore because I’m trying to grind through 30 days straight or if it’s a symptom of my disease or what. I don’t know what’s next for me, but I feel like after Serfo and Castle Wars, I may need to take a step back (temporarily).

I suck at updating my blog, but I do not suck at working out. I’ve been hitting the gym almost every day. On the days I don’t go to the gym, I take a walk outside or do something else active (like yard work).

I’m 10 days into #30daysoffencing leading up to Serfo. Today I slept through practice but did drills. I’ve been having problems with timing, so taking a couple days to do drills is helpful.

I’ll try to post some set lists. I’ve been not posting because I haven’t had pictures of them on my phone. Silly, huh? Most of my weights (that I lift) have increased. My body weight went down when I was tracking my caloric intake and focusing on cardio. I put some weight back on when I started lifting more, so I think I’m doing some body recomposition.

I’m excited to teach self-defense at a ladies only event at the gym on campus tomorrow. I hope this opens some doors to teach more Krav in my area instead of driving the better part of an hour to do it.

Tonight was Krav night. I was a little apprehensive at first, but I had a really great practice once I got moving. I got to participate since I wasn’t teaching this time.

After class, we met to discuss business stuff. I’m looking forward to growing Krav in my area!

Hiatus = over

Aside from a few stray Krav Maga classes and my walks on the beach, I didn’t work out all summer.

Today I went back to the gym. Here’s the set list.

I also competed in a fencing tournament last weekend. I didn’t win any tournaments, and I had a panic attack after lunch, but I got back into the ring and finished strong. I did good fighting, and I was proud to watch my kids do good fighting.

Depending on my insurance situation in the upcoming months, I’m going to look into seeking formal treatment for my anxiety. It’s keeping me from doing the things that I love (things that keep me from being depressed), and my little tricks aren’t cutting it anymore.

All in all, though, I’m feeling pretty good. I think that being active and eating well will help. I’ll just need that extra nudge to be my best self.

This morning I went for a walk in the beach. The water was calm, so the fish were going nuts, swimming and jumping, to oxygenate the water. That was really cool to see.

This evening was a Krav night. Eddie led class while Michael and I studied. After that, I came home and showed a few skills to my curious friends.

Last weekend was the Weekend of Tactical Decision Making in Atlanta. Nik was invited to teach on Sunday, do we traveled up for that. I wanted to go for more days, but we couldn’t work out transportation.

His class was really good, and it felt good to have a sword in my hand again. After lunch we had free time. I sparred a little bit, but I was having a rough time. I wasn’t necessarily doing poorly, but I didn’t feel in my element, and I kept crying for no reason. It really cramped my style.

I’m back home now. I went to Krav this evening. I had intended to teach defense against chokes from an angle, but we had a lot of new faces, so Eddie took lead. Plus I was late, so he already had the class warming up when I got there. I’m glad we followed his vision tonight. The class had a great energy.

I’ve made arrangements to fence on Wednesdays, and this will be my first practice in months. I’m looking forward to being there.

CIC 2 Day 10

Test day!

I went in today calm and ready. We tested B1, B2, A1, and families (plus a fitness test and some sparring drills). I passed!

I am now a full instructor for Krav Maga. It was one of the hardest things I ever did, and I made a lot of progress.

Now I’m drinking beers with my friends and defragging.

CIC 2 Day 9

Today we did our teaching tests before lunch. I wasn’t nervous while I was teaching, but I was so relieved when my lesson was over. I still have ways to improve, but I passed. All that’s left now is the physical skills test.

We practiced after lunch and did some yoga to cool down. I feel so ready and serene. I was fairly calm this morning, but when we bowed out this evening, I felt so focused and ready.

Tomorrow we meet at 9 to do our final test. Tonight, we rest.

CIC 2 Day 8

Today we covered one final technique (one used for getting through a crowd) and then prepared for a demonstration. Right before we left to do that, we took our written test. Everyone passed!

The demonstration was, no joke, at a renaissance faire. We got to enjoy the faire a bit as well as show off our technique.

When we got back to the gym, we had a short lunch break and then went over our B2 and A1 skills (plus some “families” of related techniques). Then we did some light sparring and called it a day.

I took a pretty hard blow to the head. It stunned me, but I kept going. I have a nice knot coming up, but I don’t think I have a serious injury.

My roomies and I went out for dinner. I had a soak when we came home, and my final lesson plan (for the class – obviously I’ll make more for teaching) is done!

Also, thanks to practice today and the mock B1 test we did before, I’ve done everything I will do during my skills test on Sunday. I feel at ease. I’ve practiced all I can, and I feel confident in my work.

I’m simultaneously nervous and calm. Tests can be stressful for me, but I also know I’m prepared. It’s a weird place to be.