In addition to fencing, I practice Krav Maga. Studying Krav has had a huge impact on my fencing mindset, so I don’t mind sharing an occasional story or two about it on here. This is one of those stories.

Last week we were practicing getting out of bear hugs. We were doing a drill during which one person (for this story, the person is me) stands in the room with her eyes closed. Two things might happen. Either someone with a hitting pad will yell her name, and she’ll open her eyes and either kick or hit the pad (depending on her position), OR someone will bear hug her, and she will open her eyes and get away.

So we were doing this drill, and it was my turn in the middle. The room was very quiet. I have to set the tone here, so I want you to imagine this quiet, serious scenario. Suddenly someone ran up and bear hugged me. I was more or less ready for this, but having someone suddenly grab you is usually startling. This fellow wrapped his arms tight about my midsection, and I farted. Loudly. In a very quiet room.

To my classmates’ credit, they tried to act like they didn’t hear it because this was a room full of adults, not second graders, but there was no denying exactly what just happened. So as I was fighting my way out of the bear hug, I yelled, “It’s part of my defense!” Then it was okay for everyone to laugh. Fortunately that squeeze got it all out of my system, and it didn’t happen again (plus I was lucky that it was just loud, not gross).

The moral of the story is if you ever find yourself being attacked, just let one rip. Be loud and proud. That person will probably just let you go.